As a Mormon living in California, who supports the YES on 8 campaign, I had decided that it would be a good opportunity to write this next post, on how I personally feel about same-sex marriage; and exactly why I am so passionately involved with preserving traditional marriage. But, something awful happened just yesterday, that has dramatically changed what I had intended to write about. Instead - I am compelled to discuss a very serious incident, having to do with Prop 8, and Hate...I find it almost surreal, that I am even blogging about something that is so despicable, as the hate surrounding Prop 8. I almost avoided it completely. But those who know me, know how unrealistic that would have been to expect...
The fact is, that one of my personal friends, and others in her neighborhood, also friends - not only had several Vote YES on Prop 8 signs stolen, for a second time; but this time - received identical letters, containing serious death threats.
Many of these families, who have been threatened, happen to be Mormon. My friend is Mormon. We are in the same ward. We are friends on Facebook; and that is how I found out about the death threat letters. She was mad. So, she updated her status on Facebook - about what had just happened with their YES on 8 signs being stolen. She used the words "death threats", and that caught my attention, as it would anyone. I also found out, that my sweet Bishop received the same hate letter.
I sensed both her pain and hurt. We all feel it. I took immediate action, and asked her for details. I gave her instructions as to how to report the incident to ProtectMarriage.com; still not really knowing just how substantial these death threat letters really were.
It seems that the closer election day draws- the more desperate and frequent these types of incidents, directed against the Vote YES on 8 campaign, and its supporters, are becoming. We are hearing about hate and intolerance multiple times, daily. Some are asking the question - am I safe?
Anyway, I digress... I used twitter, to let my online community of LDS friends know, about this horrid incident of hate, Prop 8, and the great lack of intolerance experienced. Thankfully, this great online community of LDS friends, rallied in concern. Gentle warnings and cautions were given, to take these death threat letters seriously. I agreed, and waited to find out more...
Later in the day, my friend emailed me a photocopy of the actual "hate" letter, containing the death threats; that so many of our dear ward members had received. She apologized for the content, with a firm warning, before I read it. Also suggesting that anything "uplifting", following such contact -would be necessary.
I thought I was prepared...
I read it. I was sick. I am still sick. My heart has been heavy, since then. The realization that evil is so close and real - is to say at the very least, extremely disturbing.
As much as I am aware of those who are motivated by hate, bigotry and lack of tolerance, in regard to same-sex marriage and homosexuality -- that is not the cause of the good people that I know, and associate with; many of which are Mormon. We have set forth to defend and preserve the institution of marriage, with not only love, but a great level of appropriate tolerance.
One cannot be positive, as to whether these death threats were specifically targeted, to this small neighborhood; where several LDS families live; in such close proximity. But the concern, certainly exists. Reactions to these death threat letters, to our fellow Mormons - have been mixed. We tend to want to move away from thoughts of religious persecution. However, this would not have happened if our position on same-sex marriage, were not faith-based, and centered in the laws of God; of which we honor.
I also found out, that on this very same night - another group of our ward members, were also served with another "letter". I have yet to read its contents.
As upsetting as the hateful letter is, of which contained personal threats of death - to these supporters of the YES on 8 cause - there is something more, that weighs heavy upon my heart. In the words of my friend, as she reached out for support...
This is a copy of the email that my friend sent to me, along with the attached letter:
"Here is a copy of the lovely letter that we received last night. We are reporting it. We had the police here last night at 11:00. And we have several places to report to for Prop 8. Those of us who received (everyone with a Prop 8 sign in our neighborhood, about 10 of us or so) it are also going to contact our local papers and I am going to Fox News.
A Bit of an Alert:
If you are easily offended by cuss words, in particular the "F" word....you may not wish to read this! Just a warning.....don't blame me!
half of me wanted to put about fifty yes on Prop 8 signs in our yard to say "You don't scare US!" and the other half wants to board the windows, eat my food storage and load my guns!
Let me know what you think....since many of you are going to need something to cleanse your mind after reading this letter I attached the other picture to make you all happy!
Your friendly Nazi,"
This particular friend, is one of the most positive people that I know. I love and appreciate her good humor, especially during this unsettling incident. Nonetheless - there is clear concern, as to what this all means, and why? It is her personal quandary, as to how to respond, that is of the greatest concern, for all of us...
No doubt, we will forgive, and continue to Stand Together... of this, I am Sure!
tMDg
Kathryn Skaggs
Note: If you would like, you may read a copy of the very disturbing "death threat letter" here. Just remember... you have been warned.
YouTube Video: Where's the Love? -- Yes on Proposition 8 (Prop 8) - Yard Signs
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Thanks For your Thoughtful and informative article.
In all honesty, I must admit that I feel persecution is not new to either side of the coin for those involved in the battle over Prop 8. Both those of the faith based community and the homosexual community have probably felt some of the effects of intolerance from others simply because of their beliefs. Even though Prop 8 has seemed to cause a division in these two communities, I believe there are definite similarities in the area of persecution that they both share.
That said, persecution and violence in any form is simply not something that should be tolerated. These acts of aggression are not acceptable and should be viewed by both communities as sickening and perverse. Quite possibly, IMHO this should act as a uniting issue, where both communities should take a stand and rebuke those who would presume to use these intolerable tactics.
A long hard look must be taken on what is happening in a “civilized” world, where the expression of one’s views would elicit violence and death threats. This is the gravest form of intolerance that can be imagined. This is an issue we all must unit against and speak out about no matter which side of the fence you sit on regarding Prop 8.
As a faith based individual I have decidedly taken a stand to vote Yes on Prop 8. I feel no hatred or repulsion for my friends in the homosexual community. Traditional marriage is an issue I feel I must speak about, teaching correct principles as I understand them, and defending the definition as it applies to my faith based teachings. This is my right as a US citizen and should be honored by all who expect the same courtesy. This to me is true tolerance, a position that can be discussed rationally and in some cases simply agree to disagree.
Violence and persecution in any form must be rooted out and we must put an end to it! United in this issue, we can overcome.
I would say I am shocked but when you stand for something you believe in, you can just expect this kind of thing. We just have to keep standing lovingly and firmly for what we believe. Thanks for sharing the truth, in the end the truth will set us free. And if the people vote in favor or in this case against something that is right, we can still rest assured that we fought righteously to the end for what was right. You are amazing!
Thank you for the post - it is important that people are made aware of this and that it is not tolerated - nor that recipients become intimidated.
In fairness, the person who wrote the letter is probably not representing the entire anti-Prop 8 community. It is most likely someone with severe undedicated mental illness or uncontrolled rage issues who has reacted to the media fervor - but then, those are often the persons who end up following through with these death threats - so I hope that the police are taking it very seriously.
It could be an attention ploy, a sick hoax, or an activist plot to scare and intimidate. Either way, it is despicable, and I hope that this person(s) be caught and prosecuted. I know that the hate crimes over Prop 8 are increasing and are very serious. This is all the more reason that a YES vote is critical.
Clint -
Thank you, for taking the time to read this post. I struggled as to whether I should even blog about such "hate", but felt that we all need to acknowledge that it exists as such a level, and perhaps, learn from it.
I myself, will continue to consider what this means, and how best to show great tolerance for others.
tDMg
Kathryn
In the doghouse -
So, what is happening is our "civilized" society?
The level of persecution, is my concern, not that it is new to either side. I also believe that most Americans, be they homosexuals or religious zealots, etc. - are quite free to live their "choices" daily; and feel free to do so...
However, today we are seeing frustration and anger escalate, which I believe is based in fear. This fear is creating a new level of anger, thus illegal persecution is on the rise. It is becoming desperate.
The need for Prop 8, is in response to a few arrogant citizens in California, who abused their authority. Look what this has caused. A FREE people, voted to preserve the traditional definition of marriage; but safety was stolen.
Fear now exists among those who value traditional marriage and family.
The sudden "Victory", that is now being experienced by the homosexual community, gives now, great power over the lives of the majority. The "majority" understand this.
So here we are... fear. I believe that "society" is experiencing heightened fear, in particular from those who feel that they have the "most" to lose...
tDMg
Kathryn
daisyrose -
Many of us feel that way, but do not really understand what that means, until your life has been threatened; because of what you believe.
The reality, is what is shocking.
tDMg
Kathryn Skaggs
MormonSoprano -
I know that is true. Mormons, definitely understand that principle. One persons behavior, is not a group, but unfortunately - it is a reflection to some degree.
As I have said in another post, deciding to blog about the hate that is associated with Prop 8 - was difficult. There is always a concern, that speaking out about it, will invite more "persecution".
I can't help but think of the Lord's counsel to Joseph Smith, in responding to his experience of Liberty Jail, and the Saints expulsion from Missouri... One only needs read D&C Section 123, to understand why it is important that even today, we document our sufferings.
tDMg
Kathryn Skaggs
I appreciated you article. It made me think of the responsibility we share in making our voices be heard - in standing up for what is right in spite of the consequences.
joann -
I believe that it is in the daily remembering, that we are enabled to continue on, and do what is right:-)
tDMg
Kathryn Skaggs
feelings are heated on both sides. it is all far more than the headlines imply and most on both sides are ill informed and not listening to the concerns and issues of the other side.
while this is a hate letter, as far as i can tell there is technically no death threat. i don't say that to invalidate the shock or horror one feels at receiving such a letter, but to help people understand the difference and realize that the threat is not likely as serious as seemingly perceived. 'i hate you and you deserve to die' is not a death threat. 'i hate you and plan to kill you' is a death threat.
while there are thousands of gay people who have been physically attacked and/or killed, there are essentially no major cases of heterosexuals being killed or bashed. you are not alone - obama supporters are getting hateful messages about white power and people are driving cars through mccain/palin signs.
most gay people in utah experience a lot of hate from mormon families on a regular basis and live under threat of losing their jobs if they are discovered. many pretend to be mormon and/or are married fearing exposure. as painful as this is, remember you are not alone in the pain and fear of threats and social condemnation. if you want to have some understanding of the pain and anger on the opposing side so you are educated about their concerns, carolyn pearson (a mormon) has a book called no more goodbyes which is at: nomoregoodbyes.com
there is a debate that was at uvu campus in utah yesterday which hopefully will be posted on their website soon and has good discussion of both sides. hopefully we can all work to sort through the concerns of the people involved and work to care for concerns and needs rather than merely attack the opposing views without consideration.
asutosh -
Perhaps you are right?
I'm certain that it is not your intent to minimize this hateful letter, by attempting to speculate as to what this author was specifically intending to say, and/or do. It is easy to make your assumption, as long as no one is hurt physically. Right?
However, I can assure you, that all those who received this despicable letter on the doorsteps of their homes, have felt threatened and continue to have concerns for their personal safety.
I can't help, but compare such an assault, to the mind of a terrorist. Often times, a terrorists only objective is to instill fear in their victims. That alone - is considered an assault of the way a person is enabled to live their life - freely.
Bottom line - it is unacceptable, no matter the justifications of how this side or that side have acted.
In response to your feelings of not being understood, by those who oppose same-sex marriage, and a homosexual lifestyle. It is my opinion, that because you are making this request of those who have a very firm, faith-based position - as to why they will only support traditional marriage - your arguments, to redefine marriage, will always fail.
Most good Christians, are readily accepting of all people, regardless of lifestyle choices. However, that does not mean that they must also be accepting of those choices; if they contradict personal beliefs and values. This is something that the gay community finds quite frustrating.
I am truly sorry, for anyone who must live in fear, because of the personal lifestyle choices, that they have made.
More education, and better understanding can only improve the situation. But, attempting to force upon others, that which they are offended by - will never bring about positive results.
tDMg
Kathryn
I'm an Orthodox Christian and I have a good friend who joined the Mormon church recently.
My prayers are with you. I support Proposition 8. Proposition 8 wouldn't be necessary if California did not have an out-of-control judiciary.
-Thomas K
Victory Cross
True to the faith! Thank you for your comments. Please send any rabid mormon haters to my blog to deal with their hate:
mormonhatershow.blogspot.com
Victorycross -
You are absolutely correct. We are involved with Prop 8, only because these four arrogant judges overturned the voice of 61% of Californians. It is truly disgraceful, and should outrage every American citizen.
Thank you for your support, and your prayers.
tDMg
Kathryn Skaggs
Weston -
Thanks for your vote of confidence. By the way... that is some blog you've got going on! LOL
tDMg
Kathryn Skaggs
I want to start off by saying that I am gay. I do not hate those voting Yes on 8, but I do dislike their ignorance. This issue is not one of 'majority' decision and should not lie in the hands of the voters. This is an example of the explicit reasoning considered when drafting state and federal constitutions, that the "inalienable" rights of the few will not be trampled upon by the many.
Benjamin -
What I hear you saying, is that you do not hate "us" for voting yes on 8, because you think we are ignorant about the issue? Somehow that works for you...
I can assure you, that we are not. In fact, the entire campaign by our opponents, was one of lies and distortions. If that is your source for facts, then I am sorry that you have been mislead.
The YES on 8 ran a very credible campaign, to educate on the subject and importance of preserving traditional marriage. They were also very good at educating people about the effects IF Prop 8 were not to pass.
Strong evidence of these possible results, were based on facts - and not speculation, lies or distortions.
Those that I know, who voted YES on 8 - did so to preserve traditional marriage, in every way possible.
You are gay. Prop 8 had nothing to do with taking away any of your rights. Your life has not changed. Prop 8 was a restoration of the last time we voted on this same issue in California; which was illegally taken from US.
Our opponents are once again, trying to take away our VOTE, and that is all of our RIGHT! I'm not sure what you are all thinking, when taking away another U.S. citizens vote, is a way to get what you want????
If you are suggesting that your cause, is one of equal rights - and therefore the constitution has a job to protect you - then I strongly disagree; as do many blacks, etc...
Personally - I find it offensive that the gay community is attempting a parallel comparison to the civil rights movement. A black person could never be, or choose to NOT be black - but on the other hand, the nature/nurture debate of homosexuality is not conclusive... no comparison, whatsoever.
tDMg
Kathryn